I'm going to go back a couple of days to lead up to what's happening today. I got a call from Aunt Vickie very early Friday morning and she was extremely upset. She said she wanted to talk to me but couldn't do it over the phone so I invited her over for lunch. My mind started racing trying to think what could have happened and why couldn't she tell me over the phone. About 15 minutes later, she called back hysterically crying and told me that her sister, my Aunt Pam, had passed away. She couldn't call my mom (aka Neena) which meant I had to make the dreaded phone call. I tried calling mom several times but no answer. We met Heather and the girls at the Spring Hill park at 10am. When we arrived at the park, nobody was there so I tried mom one more time and she picked up the phone. She had just got back from running a few errands and told me a realtor was about to come over. Oh man, telling her that Pam had passed away was the hardest thing I've done in a long time.
Pam's death has brought up so many heart aches and so many regrets for the entire Wright family. I've lived here for six months and I've seen all of my aunts and uncle that live here except for Aunt Pam. I regret not making the effort to see her and introduce her to Beck and Kinsey. Luckily, Mom and Aunt Vickie spent almost a full day with Pam before Mom moved to Costa Rica.
Grandma and Grandpa had seven kids...Mom was the oldest and Pam was the baby sister. Pam was 12 years old when I was born and Mom said Pam would hold me every chance she could. (I was the first grandchild.) Mom and Vickie told me that Pam loved me so much which makes me wish I had made the effort to see her. At the very tender age of 16, Grandma and Grandpa abandoned Pam! Poor Pam spent several months with her aunt and uncle in Longview and they ended up hurting Pam too. Pam had one child, Jennifer, at a young age and Grandma some how convinced her that she was too young to raise a child so she relinquished her rights to Grandma. For some unknown reason, Jennifer was the apple of Grandma's eye. She could never do anything wrong. Jennifer learned early in her childhood that she could make up stories and get away with it. All of the grand kids didn't like being around Jennifer because she couldn't do anything wrong and we ended up getting in trouble. Even Grandma's own children resented this relationship. Grandma and Jennifer spoke badly of Pam and they both kept Jennifer's kids from seeing Pam which is the saddest part of this story. She, so badly wanted to see her grand kids to the point that she would drive by the house and throw notes in the yard in hopes that one of the kids would find it but Grandma found every single one of them and hid them in a box. After she moved out of her house that Jennifer and the kids live in, she told Jennifer to go thru them in case Pam had put money in them. How heart breaking is that story? Pam led a very hard and difficult life but she was fortunate to find a man that loved her for 34 years. It's not often that you hear of a marriage lasting that long these days. They went thru some tough times, as most couples do, but he stood by her side and we are all so grateful that she had him in her life. She was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and was told that she had six months at the most but she fought that disease for two years! She asked her husband, Gary, to not contact the family when she was in the hospital. Mom hates that she wasn't there to tell her how much she loved her and wanted to be by her side before she passed away. She also asked for a closed casket but Gary went against her wishes and let her sisters see her and I hope he knows how much that meant to Mom, Trish and Vickie.
Today, Pamela Jean was laid to rest at Memory Park Cemetery at the young age of 55 years old. Her own mother, daughter and grand kids did not make an appearance but that's probably a good thing because it might have got ugly because of the hurt they caused sweet Pamela Jean. My Aunt Trish spoke about Pam and told a few funny stories which I thoroughly enjoyed hearing since Mom never speaks about her childhood.
Grandpa said he dreaded coming home from work to find Pam in the driveway because that meant something had happened. (This sounds very familiar since Wendy told Mom things I had done as soon as she got home which drove me crazy.)
They lived near a church for black people and Pam ran to Trish and Vickie saying a black man was outside their house wanting to get them so they hid under the bed for a long time. Trish said she finally noticed that Pam didn't seem as scared so she looked out the window and saw a black cow! Trish said she was so mad at Pam for playing that joke on them.
They grew up in a pier and beam house and a skunk had got under it and sprayed. They all stunk really bad but Grandma sent them to school anyway. Mom said the windows had to be lowered on the school bus because they smelled so bad. The principal of the school loaded all of them up on a bus and sent them home because the smell in the class rooms were too much to handle. Can you imagine how embarrassed they were?
They lived near a church for black people and Pam ran to Trish and Vickie saying a black man was outside their house wanting to get them so they hid under the bed for a long time. Trish said she finally noticed that Pam didn't seem as scared so she looked out the window and saw a black cow! Trish said she was so mad at Pam for playing that joke on them.
They grew up in a pier and beam house and a skunk had got under it and sprayed. They all stunk really bad but Grandma sent them to school anyway. Mom said the windows had to be lowered on the school bus because they smelled so bad. The principal of the school loaded all of them up on a bus and sent them home because the smell in the class rooms were too much to handle. Can you imagine how embarrassed they were?
They grew up without hugs, kisses and I love you's which isn't that uncommon back in those days. Grandma and Grandpa had a child every single year so I'm sure life was very difficult for all of them but I can't imagine turning my back on my child. We all have to answer for our sins so I'll leave the judging to our Heavenly Father.
Rest in peace my dear, sweet Aunt Pam...we love you and will miss you so much!
